Are you a good listener?
I find many executives are poor listeners.
In fact, nearly half of the clients I work with need to dramatically improve their listening skills. I know demonstrating good listening skills are a “foundational” skill leaders need to employ effectively. These skills impact so many other leadership competencies such as emotional intelligence, collaboration, team building, developing a strategic mindset and even being an effective delegator.
Step back a moment and think about the consequences and carnage of being a poor listener.
- You are perceived as uncaring and lacking empathy;
- You are thought to be disrespectful;
- You miss out on key information points that allow you to see and understand the entire picture and viewpoints of others;
- You are perceived as stubborn, “pig-headed” and already having your mind made up; even when you ask for feedback and assistance, it appears gratuitous and frequently condescending; or
- You can be seen as “clueless” when you ask a question already asked by another or you fail to follow directions because you missed important information.
You can well imagine this list goes on and on. So does the carnage.
Are you a good listener?
A quick and easy way to find out is to ask a trusted colleague, preferably someone who is a good listener. Developing self-awareness is the first step in just about any behavior change. Ask them “Do I demonstrate the behaviors of a good listener?” Then close your lips and open your ears. Pay attention and do not seek clarification just yet… and then after they finish speaking, offer two simple words: “thank you.” Thank them for the gift they just shared with you. If you attempt to refute their opinions and observations, do not bother to ask for their help again. You probably just shut them down and perhaps shut them out as an ally to improve your leadership skills of listening.
Next posts? How to become an effective listener. Stay tuned.
